Am I a good enough teacher?

This has been a tough week. My SOL test scores dropped so much compared to last year. A few seniors are going to fail my English class, and I've been BEGGED to make exceptions and provide extensive extra credit (I've said "no").

I've been losing sleep and not eating well, wondering, "Am I a good enough teacher for these kids?" and "Am I making the right decision by still working them at the end of the year, even if that makes them hate me?" and "Is letting them fail the right thing to do?" Many tears have been shed, and many med ball slams and runs have been done with great zeal in order to release frustration ;)

Then, the following verse came to mind... "For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ." Galatians 1:10

I can't be someone else.
I can only be me.
Others may be richer, more popular, or more successful, but I shouldn't measure myself by comparing.
I shouldn't be trying to seek others' approval.
I should do the best I can with what I've been given.
I should teach in a way that maximizes my gifts and talents.
I should love and serve my kids every day the way the Lord calls me to, whether or not it's popular.
I should do what is right and ethical, even if that means a kid fails 12th grade English.

I should...but I don't.

This past year as a teacher has truly, honestly been a "character building" experience. When I was in college, I thought I was just going to naturally be the most amazing teacher ever. Real life has been a RUDE awakening. My kids have, literally, been "rude" awakenings, if you catch my drift ;)

But, I can't imagine anything else I'd rather be doing right now.

Here's to a three-day weekend with time to reflect over a cup of coffee and a good book, and a fresh week next week to impact the lives of young people!