Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Assert Thyself.

Soap box issues. You know you have them, too.

I have a LOT of these issues, and if you read my blog or know me in real life, I'm sure you know what they are by now. Standardized testing. Gentle parenting. Cats being highly evolved and superior to dogs. Grammar. Freedom of religion, freedom of speech, and freedom from our over-involved big government. Teaching.

And I'm trying to temper my desire to constantly spout my opinions about these issues, because I know it's a turn off. But today, you have to indulge me.

Women who have opinions, a backbone, and an assertive nature are NOT bad people, or "b-words." I'm not sure what it is about us girls that makes us think we have to be super nice all the time and let ourselves get walked all over. There is nothing wrong with an assertive, firm, "No, thank you" when a telemarketer calls. There is nothing wrong with telling a guy who whistles at you and yells dirty things "You may not speak to me like that. That is disrespectful." There is nothing wrong with telling someone who's talking your ear off, "I have to go. We can continue this conversation at a later date."

I'm just trying to figure out why some people think it's "mean" or "rude" for women to be assertive and stand up for themselves. It is absolutely not. Is it because of the patriarchal roots of our society? Is it because we as women tend to be more relational...we don't want to offend people and have them not like us? Something else?

I'm not entirely sure. But what I am learning is this: I have big feelings and strong opinions. In the past, I have oscillated between fake, pleasant smiles/keeping my mouth shut and saying whatever comes to mind/disregarding others' feelings. Now, I'm trying to find a balance.

Kindness and assertiveness are not mutually exclusive.




Wednesday, September 19, 2012

The Autumn Leaves

Every single time I hear the phrase "autumn leaves," I think of this Victor Borge video. Yes, I love this man and his sense of humor. What formerly homeschooled piano player wouldn't? :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=by8q5uHDhNU

I think that Victor Borge and I would have been good friends. I could see us walking around Colonial Williamsburg together, pranking unsuspecting tourists and sneaking into the Geddy House to play a chopsticks duet on the harpsicord. Sidenote: did you know that a harpsicord looks like a piano, but the strings are plucked instead of hammered? Someday, when hubby and I have a house, I want a music room with a piano, harpsicord, English guitar, hammer dulcimer, and pennywhistle. /sidenote

I doubt that I'll ever formally study music again; I'm not disciplined enough. Also, I'm really out of practice at actually reading music and prefer just to listen and parrot. I like to just have some chords in front of me as a guide (as I'm also TERRIBLE at memorizing music...oh, and I get nervous playing in front of people).Thus, playing acoustic covers of "Titanium." and "Call Me Maybe" is sufficient for now.

Does this mean I'm wasting my musical talent? I don't think so. I'd like to use it to bring joy to others, God, and to myself, too. I would not like to end up all over YouTube with people making snide comments. And maybe this is why I never post videos of myself playing or singing...maybe I'm just too insecure and would prefer this gift to remain hidden from the outside world unless I'm doing something just for the fun of it.

Then again, Victor Borge did both. He played in public AND he had a heck of a lot of fun doing so.

Maybe the key is just being yourself, using your gifts in a way that YOU know you're called to do, and saying "whoop-dee-doo" to the people who try to tell you what you should be doing with your talents and abilities.

Or maybe, sometimes those other people have a valid point that should be considered. Maybe they are giving you the kick in the pants you truly need, even if you don't LIKE it. Maybe they're what God is using to get you where you need to be doing what you need to be doing.

All that from a Victor Borge video, ladies and gents.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Why don't I like Twilight?

I've always been an avid reader. Mom would take us to the library as kids, and I'd leave with armfuls of books. Then, the next day, when I'd finished those, I'd start reading the books Mom was reading (mostly Christian fiction). She'd start to get a little annoyed when I'd catch up to her spot in the book/pass her/bug her to just "hurry up and finish it" so we could get the sequel from the library.

Anyway, the point is, I have always loved reading. Well, except for those two years of college when I majored in English and felt I could never devote the proper amount of time to the three novels I had to read per week or whatever ridiculous amount of reading we had to do. But I love it again now. I try to read books that are relevant to my high school students so I can make good book recommendations to them.

Thus, it is with a valid excuse that I can say, "I have read all the Twilight books."

And, as an English teacher, I can also say, "Those books are awful. They are poorly written. The characters are lame. The 'girls need a boy' message makes me want to vomit. Reading this series was more painful and torturous than slowly pulling Band-Aids off my abnormally hairy arms while simultaneously being submerged in an ice bath."

So, you should check out this hilariously brilliant Tumblr: http://reasoningwithvampires.tumblr.com/page/2

Seriously. It is my new favorite. Enjoy!

Edited to add: Thanks, Emily from GCM, for sharing that website. And there might be some occasional language on the website...but it's still worth taking a look at!