Busy, busy, busy!

You know those people who complain all.the.time about how busy they are, but secretly they love that they're busy because it makes them feel accomplished and successful? And maybe even the slightest bit prideful that they can juggle so much?

I was am one of those people.

I think it's a personality thing; I get bored easily and always have to be on the go. Until recently, I hadn't learned the value of taking time to rest and just BE instead of DO, DO, DO.

Then, I wrote down my schedule:
Monday: work 8-4, coach volleyball 4:30-6:15, play volleyball for two hours (game times vary...sometimes I wasn't getting home until 11:30).
Tuesday: work 8-4, coach volleyball 4:15-6:00, workout from 6:45-7:45.
Wednesday: work 8-5 *YAY! A day to stay after school and grade!*, coach volleyball 5:30-6:45, play volleyball 7-9.
Thursday: work 8-4, coach volleyball 4:15-6, workout from 6:45-7:45.
Friday-Sunday: half of my weekends, travel out of town to coach volleyball all weekend. The other half, try desperately to catch up on grading, planning, laundry, dishes, cooking, cleaning, and sleep.

Then it hit me: I AM OUT OF CONTROL. I am a slave to my overbooked schedule.

My whole life, I've taken pride in being busy. I loved when people heard my schedule and exclaimed, "Oh my word, how do you do it all?"

But I am not doing it all well.

I'm not a good teacher, because I'm too busy coaching.

I'm not a good coach, because I'm having to skip practice to teach/tutor/grade and play.

I'm not a good player, because I'm exhausted all the time. 

 I'm partially exhausted all the time from the workouts twice a week and lack of sleep.

I'm not a good homemaker, because I'm just trying to keep up with laundry so we have clean underwear for the week. Literally, that is my life right now.

It's time to simplify, to grow up, and to prioritize. It's time to make some tough choices. And it's time to just have some quiet time, some rest. What's wrong with that? Why do I feel like a failure if I let myself relax? Why do I feel guilty for not being "productive" every minute of the day?

I don't know, but I suspect many of my blog entries this summer will be about me trying to introduce simplicity and margins into my life. Be gentle with me, folks. Hold my hand, and offer advice if you have any.

Enough is enough. And honestly, I don't like that I've bought into the American mindset of "busy busy busy = success." I don't think that's God's best for me, or you, or anyone.

Here's to the journey towards simplicity and purpose!